The Foodie Report
Ruminations on food, cooking in and eating out in our area.

It's entirely possible to be a vegetarian in Porkopolis. Pop culture reporter Lauren Bishop blogs about products, recipes and restaurants she's tried for others who eat meat-free. E-mail her at lbishop@enquirer.com.

Nicci King is an unabashed foodie and the Lifestyle/Food editor in The Enquirer's features department. She loves to discover new food faves, and she's on a daily quest to answer one burning question: What's for dinner? E-mail her at nking@enquirer.com.

Enquirer Weekend editor Julie Gaw tends to order the same dish every time she eats at a restaurant, but periodically ventures out to discover something new and fabulous. After living in China, Hong Kong, the Philippines and Thailand for more than 8 years, she craves tasty Asian food. E-mail her at jgaw@enquirer.com.

Food/dining writer Polly Campbell loves every quirk and secret of Cincinnati's food personality, and is on a constant lookout for something good to eat. Keep an eye out for her restaurant picks, or see how she's progressing toward becoming famous for her apple pie. E-mail her at pcampbell@enquirer.com.

Communities reporter Rachel Richardson is on a mission to prove vegetarians eat more than lettuce. She shares both her graduate work on American food culture and food-related news.. E-mail her at rrichardson@enquirer.com.

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Wednesday, January 17, 2007

A semi-mean rant for which I'll take 100% of the credit

As a kid, you probably heard the same lectures I did: "If you don't anything nice to say, keep quiet." My parents taught me well. But you know what? My parents don't "get" blogs, so they probably aren't reading this right now! So the lesson for today is "If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me!" (That's one of the many memorable lines in "Steel Magnolias". But you knew that, right? Don't make me sic Ouiser Boudreaux on you...)

I saw some of the most hilarious blog entries today. Although many were older, they were all about Sandra Lee's "70% store-bought/ready-made products accompanied by 30% fresh and creative touches that allows anyone to take 100% of the credit" approach to "cooking," if you want to call it that. This recent entry posted on one of my favorite food blogs makes some valid points about the general state of things over at The Food Network. But
this older blog had me in tears, I was laughing so hard.

It's nice to know I'm not alone in my disdain for headbands that match plastic placemats and "tablescapes" laden with dollar store finds and semi-edible "food."
Sandra Lee is without shame in the way she "cuts corners" in the kitchen. Why not call it what it is? "Cooking Like A 7-Year-Old"? Open some boxes, add water, some fake flowers and tacky napkin rings and you have a "beeeeeeeeee-utiful" dinner. Um, how about not? Thanks.

I mean, I'm not unreasonable. I don't expect anyone to make a rack of lamb and a port-fig reduction after being at the office and/or chasing the kiddies around all day. Most nights, I barely feel like grilling chicken breasts when I get home. But, c'mon people! Where is our foodie integrity? Or maybe I'm just blind with jealousy because she has published cookbooks and has her own show on The Food Network. Hmm... That's definitely it...


at 9:34 AM Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nikki...love this post, LOVE IT!!

I cannot quite tell you the expletives that blurt from my mouth every time this insipid woman comes on screen while I'm enjoying my saturday morning coffee.

As a man that loves to cook, its almost insulting to watch her open a bag of salad greens, and have the nerve to serve that to guests...

I think her lastest season has toned down some of here "theme" oriented shows, and some of those awful outfits.

The other food host that just chaps my ass is Robin Miller...the soccer mom of home cooks...

Thanks for letting me rant!!

at 5:36 PM Anonymous Anonymous said...

By the way, I simply HAD to watch last Saturday. Call it a sick fascination... She made this treat and suggested people serve it at a poker party:


I suggest you make sure your homeowner's insurance policy covers accidents like this.

at 10:12 AM Blogger Brando315 said...

As soon as you posted that, I KNEW it had to be the chicken caesar salad on a boboli crust. She is a HACK! Yes, I had the same fascination wondering what sort of trainwreck recipes she was ready to whip up...and alas, here it is Saturday, we have the coffee ready, and I have to think she's ready for a super bowl party. Bring out the cans of Hormel, and velveeta baby!!

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